Happy Birthday Little Man

So tommorow is Kai's birthday he will be 2 on one note its a happy day my boy is growing up. And on the other note my boy is growing up and I no longer have any babies that need me. I broke down and cried tonight because all the doubts I had about going through with the vasectomy came bubbling up and I almost started to regret it. The yearning for that baby to cuddle and feed and that baby that depends on its ever need to be met by you. The wimpers and cries, cooing, giggling, smiles, drool , baby formula, newborn diapers, baby clothes, crib, baby toys, tiny baby shoes and socks, little sockless baby feet, that baby smell I guess you get it .. Its all a distant memory now. Its sad but at the same time good. I can go on with a new chapter of my life Mom of kids not babies. More freedom, no sleepless nights except for the occasional sick nights which are quickly remedied by cold medicine. Owies, bandaids, scrapes and cuts, video games, trucks, DIRT and more DIRT, bugs, and more DIRT , fights, wrestling, broken legs and of course lets not forget the Dirt. My boys are growing and I can't stop it mom is feeling a little left out sometimes now. I sometimes feel I can't relate i'm not a boy I was never around boys growing up I don't have the slightest clue what boys really do I'm learning with them. And so the next chapter in my life begins.... Goodbye my babies and hello big boys. Happy birthday Kai my little man even though your my smallest boy you have just as much hold of my heart as your older brothers. I love you all more than you could possibly ever know.